One year

A year ago today our lives forever changed.  We go the best, most unexpected surprise of our life..a positive pregnancy test (ok, 3 positive tests..ha).  We were shocked and scared but so excited to see what the future held.  

A year later we are so happy that this is what our family picture looks like this...

We can't imagine our life any other way.  We often say it's hard to remember what life before Kason was like.  What did we do with all of that free time?!  So crazy to think about!  I know one things for sure, a year later our love for this sweet baby boy has multiplied more than we ever thought possible.  We are so thankful that God decided the time was right for us to welcome our son into our family. :) 

You can read more about the day we found out here.

A year later, we are one happy family of three! :)

Kason is 4 months!

I can hardly believe it.  Kason is 4 months old today!  I remember when I was pregnant with Kason and started thinking about maternity leave.  I knew that I would start my leave sometime in March and would go back when school started at the end of July.  I specifically remember thinking about how far away that seemed and that 4 months seemed like so much time to be home with my baby.  Man..was I wrong!  It has flown by and in just a couple of weeks I will return to work.  But, let's not talk about that right now!

Kason goes for his 4 month appointment on Monday, so I will update his hight and weight then.  We'll see if he's still on the small side.  I have this feeling he will be!

Here's some of the things Kason has been up to lately (with pictures..ha!):

Kason LOVES. . . 

...Standing up!  Obviously, he can't stand up on his own but he loves for others to hold him in the standing position.  He's a strong little guy and I think once he starts crawling and walking our lives will be nonstop!  Along with others holding him in the standing position, he loves to be held..but only if you are standing up.  This is not always true, but when he is fussy he really prefers to be standing. Duane and I joke around at night during Kason's fussy time (so we don't pull our hair out) and sometimes sit down and Kason starts screaming.  As soon as we stand up, silence.  This kid is spoiled! 

...his exersaucer!  This was given to up by a family friend and I tucked it away in the basement thinking we wouldn't need it for a while.  About a week before vacation I remembered I had it and thought since Kason liked standing up so much, he might love it.  Sure enough, it was love at first sight!  Kason loves to play and talk with all of the farm animals that are attached.  He gets tired of standing after about 15 minutes, but those 15 minutes are pure joy for Kase!

...Grabbing!  This kid now is well aware he has hands and loves to grab his toys, rattles, keys, toes and of course, mama's hair (hints the hair cut that took place last week).  It's so neat to see him slowly understand how his hands work.

...Smiling!  I can't help but think of the quote from the movie Elf..."I just like to smile, smiling's my favorite!"  This little guy has a smile that just melts my heart.  He's such a sweet, happy baby and although I am sad that he is no longer a newborn, it is so fun to see his personality emerge.  I just can't get enough of this happy boy!

{The days of me sitting Kason in the corner of our glider and him not moving are over!  I went to snap these pictures the other day and he quickly rolled forward!}

Kason does NOT love. . . 

...Nighttime.  After about 9 P.M. is meltdown time here at our house.  Kason is usually exhausted by this time, so he takes a short cat nap.  He always wakes up angry and just cries and cries.  We try to hold him off until 10 and then give him a bath.  Bath time always calms him down and he is all smiles the second his skin hits that warm water.  After bath time I put lotions on him, read to him (if he's not screaming), nurse him, and then put him to bed.  He almost always goes right to sleep.  I feel like he might be needing an earlier bedtime, but I'm nervous to try it.  When we've put him to bed earlier before, he doesn't sleep thru the night.  He still needs that 10:30 feeding, but he's so exhausted and cranky it's hard to know what to do.  When school starts I will be getting up at 5 A.M. and would love an earlier (maybe 9?) bedtime, I just hope he'll sleep thru the night.  I'd rather him go to bed late then wake up at 2 A.M.!  Ha!  I'm hoping that when he starts cereal we can feed him some right before bed and that will help keep his tummy full until the morning.  Whew, that was long!

...Sitting still.  This kid is a mover!  When I lay him down on his back he flails around like he's trapped and can't move.  He either has to be sitting up (with the help of his bumbo or boppy), laying on his play-mat, or standing up.  I'm going to lose a lot of weight once this little guy is on the move!

...Tummy time.  Although he is starting to tolerate it more and more, he still gets frustrated when I lay him on his tummy.  He usually scoots himself across the play mat and eventually flips himself back to his back.  One of these days he might like tummy time but until then, I'll just keep trying it in small portions!

{He may not like it, but he looks pretty cute spending time on his tummy!}

And as if you haven't seen enough of my sweet baby..here are the 4 month pictures!





{This one cracks me up!  Such a little model!}

{Daddy was home to help us with pictures today!}

Happy 4 months sweet baby boy!  Mama and Daddy love you more and more everyday! :)  

Happy Saturday!

Mamarazzi

I think I have an obsession with taking pictures of Kason.  I mean like a problem that could very well need an intervention asap.  Ha!  I probably take at least 10 pictures of him a day..and I'm not ashamed to admit it!  I bought my camera about a year and a half ago in hopes of learning how to use it before I had kids.  Well, I didn't think I'd have kids this early..but I got blessed with the cutest baby in the world, and I'm not complaining!  I've gotten so much practice with my camera and love all of my pictures of sweet Kason.  I know I will cherish them when he is older!  I've been reading the book "Mamarazzi" and I'm pretty sure that word sums me up.

I love evening lighting.  oOne thing I've learned since I've had my camera is it's the best lighting for pictures, especially of people.  Middle of the day lighting is pretty harsh on Kason's sweet little face, so I try and stay clear of it.  About the time 7 rolls around, the sun it at the perfect place and I just love it! Last night Duane was at class and Kason and I were tired of playing under his play-mat so I snatched him up and took him outside for a little photoshoot.  You know, since he had changed so much since the day before.  Ha!  Anyways..here are some of the pictures I took.  I think they're pretty cute, but I've been known to be slightly biased. :)

{Looking quite plump in this picture.  Love it!}

{Smiles and drool..Kason's two favorite things!}

{This is his annoyed look.  I have a feeling I'll be seeing it a lot more in the coming years!}

{Love the sun in this one!}

I'm no professional, but I am learning so much about my camera and photography each day.  I can't wait to get a NEW camera in a couple of weeks and start learning even more! :)

Happy Friday!!

A balancing act

Just a warning - I'm just back from a long walk in which I've had a lot of time to think about what I want to say in this blog post.  Therefore you are about to read words that are straight from my heart and you are about to see the inter-workings of my mind over the past 4 months.  It may be long, so just bare with me.

Moving on..

I was a cheerleader in high school.  I was the one that they threw up in the air and held me in obscure positions high off the ground for way too long.  Being a flyer meant you had to have good balance.  Let's just say, I did not.  I got better with practice but still, as a senior, I struggled.  Everything had to be perfectly in order for me to stay up in a pyramid for a mere 10 seconds.  I mean hands had to be placed on my foot/feet perfectly or all you know what would break loose.  The one time something was out of place, that was it, I came flailing to the ground and prayed that my bases would catch me and that I would not break another back spot's nose (which really happened...more than once...woops). 

Throughout my life I have noticed that this cheerleading story is kind of like an ever present representation of my ability to balance things, people, or tasks in my life.  If too many tasks are at hand I struggle to find a way to balance them.  If too many people are needing my attention or help I get overwhelmed at the thought of distributing my time evenly (which is kind of ironic considering I'm a teacher and this is a MAJOR part of my job).  I can multitask, but I find it hard to balance my attention when doing so.  Balancing and I just aren't friends.  Never have been.  When I was in elementary school my teachers would always check the box on my report card that said "uses time wisely".  And by check, it means I didn't do it..in case there's any confusion.  Ha!  I think my lack of time management was due to my constant need to socialize instead of focusing on school work.  I couldn't balance both things and therefore, I get the check and the ever dreaded parent lecture.  Side-note: I'm sure Kason is looking forward to those lectures. :)

So you might understand my great anxiety when I think about going back to teaching and balancing my career with being a mom and a wife and a daughter and a sister and a friend...the list goes on.  But my main fear is balancing being a mommy with being a teacher.  Why is this so hard to grasp?  Well because I'm new at both of these things.  I've only been a mom for 4 months and a teacher for 1.5 years.  Insert stress here.  So over the past few months I've been praying and thinking about what this balance would look like.

When I got pregnant one of the main reasons that I was so upset about the timing was the fact that I would most likely not be able to stay home with my baby.  This was a dream crusher at the time and I really struggled with it.  My mom stayed home until I was a sophomore in high school and I loved the experiences I had with her and my sisters.  Because of this I always wanted to stay home when I had kids.  I never really gave it a second thought, I just thought it would work out.  When I got pregnant (almost a year ago to date) I realized my dream might be flying out the window, and that was hard.  Financially, it would be hard for me to stay home since Kason was going to arrive a bit earlier than we had planned.  I kind of put the thought of what August 2011 would look like on the back burner and tried to enjoy my pregnancy.  I continued in this state of "not facing my feelings" up until about 2 months ago.

August was only a couple of months away and I had a decision to make.  Would I leave a job I love and stay home or would I continue to teach and somehow find a way to balance it all.  I prayed and prayed about this.  And when I say I prayed I mean you can page thru my prayer journal and I mention this decision in about every entry.  God slowly showed me what I was supposed to do, in the most subtle ways of course.  I decided I would continue teaching.  It would be hard, probably one of the hardest things I've done, but it's what I want to do.

After I made this decision I of course went into a mindset that I would be missing out on Kason's life.  What if I miss his first words?  What if I miss his first steps?  Next, there were the thoughts about my job. What if I'm not a good teacher because I'm worried about how Kason is at home?  What if I'm crabby towards my students because I'm so exhausted from working and being a mom.  I could go on and on.  There will always be the what ifs.  But I have decided is that I will stop thinking what if, and start learning how to balance being the best mom AND the best teacher I can be.  I honestly think this will teach me more discipline and organization.  It will teach me to use every ounce of my prep to prepare for the next school day, so that I can go home to my baby and leave thoughts of school at school.  It will teach me to truly cherish the hours in a day I have with Kason.  It will teach me to be more organized and to use my time wisely (this would make all my elementary school teachers proud:))  I will give both jobs my all.


I still struggle daily with the thought of going back to work.  The first day back will be rough and I'm sure I'll shed a few tears.  That being said, I am looking forward to going back to teaching.  I'm excited to meet my new class for next year and to meet the 25-30 students I have prayed for this summer.  I absolutely love teaching and would miss it greatly if I left.  I know there will be days when I wish I was with Kason, but that's okay.  I'm doing what's best for my family and that is what I keep saying over and over again in my head.  This is what I want to do right now and it's what works for us.  I'm at peace with this because it is a decision I made (with the help of my wonderful husband and of course, God).  I will always be a mommy first and a teacher second, that will never change.

I want to end this post by saying how grateful I am for my job.  I have such a supportive staff (including another new mom/teacher) that will be 100% supportive towards me.  I love the students I work with and work hard at being a positive adult influence in their lives.  I have family and friends who will (and already have been) be supportive and for that I am so thankful.  Teaching really is the best job for a mom.  The school I teach at is on a really great schedule where we go for 9 weeks and then have 2 weeks off.  This will give me lots of breaks with Kason as well as 2 months in the summer.  I've never been a teacher for the time off, but I do love this schedule! :)  Duane's mom was a teacher while he was growing up and he told me the other day that he has so many memories of spending time with his mom in the summer.  He doesn't remember her working while he was at his grandparents, he remembers the fun memories he had with her while she was home.  That is what I hope and pray Kason remembers.

Thanks for listening.  I would appreciate any prayers come July 28 (first teacher day).  


Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Vacation 2011

We just returned from our first vacation as a family of 3 (Ok, it was last week, and I'm just now getting around to blogging about it, where does the time go?!).  We went to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina with some of our best friends.  Although it was a lot of work, it was so much fun taking Kason to the beach for the first time.  It's amazing how much vacation changes when you have a baby!  Kason's schedule was off quiet a bit, which is to be expected.  I was worried about this but we figured out a "vacation schedule" that worked for us.  For the most part, Kason was a happy, easy going baby on this trip.  We can't wait for many more family vacations in the future!

Here's a little glimpse into what we did:

We spent time at the pool and on the beach...


{Kason really liked the pool..the ocean, not so much!}


{Taking his morning nap in his beach tent!}






{View from our 15th floor balcony!}

We spent 3 of our nights going out to eat and shopping...




{Duane and I waiting to eat at Margaritaville!  Kason was asleep in his stoller :)}






{One of mine and Duane's favorite southern restaurants!}


{Such a fun place!}

And of course we (ok..I) took lots of pictures...












{love this one of Duane and Kason}


{The boys in their tank tops!}


{Auntie L and Kason}







Whew, that was long!  Happy Monday! :)

Random Sunday

Duane is out golfing, Kason is sound asleep in his crib, and Kaia is passed out on the cold tile floor.  Sounds like a few free minutes of blog time!  Here are some random bits of information.

1. I'm way behind on blogging.  I started this blog so that I could upload pictures and record memories.  I need to blog about vacation, Duane's first Father's Day, and a few other things.  I think my biggest problem is the fact that I like to edit all of the photos I upload onto my blog.  This takes forever and I just don't have as much time as I used to. Maybe I'll get to it...someday!

2. How is it possible that my sweet baby is going to be FOUR months old next weekend?!  Where is the time going?

3. Is it weird that I bump Kason up to the next size in diapers whenever we run out of his current size?  We were so blessed to be gifted with lots of diapers for our showers, so I've only had to buy one bag!  Currently Kason is wearing size 1, but we are all out so I think I'll bump him up to size 2, since I have lots of them.  Hey, it's all about saving money...right?! :)

4. I have mastitis...again.  I swear, it is the most awful infection I've ever had (as if I get infections often).  Last night I was pretty certain that I was not going to survive the night.  Thank goodness for doctors on call even on weekends.  I got a prescription and slowly starting to feel better.

5. We've been working on tummy time here at the Gibbs' house!  Kason is not a fan, but as his neck gets stronger he will tolerate it more.  I snapped this cute picture of him the other day while he was on his tummy...


6. We spent a day at the lake yesterday.  It was a perfect summer day.  88 degrees, not a cloud in the sky.  I think everyday should be like yesterday..minus the humidity.  Here are a few pictures from the lake...




7. I really am not a huge fan of cats.  Over the course of my 21 years at my parents' house I had 3 cats.  All 3 were not very nice.  However, I think kittens are the cutest things!  My friend, Nicole, found this sweet stray kitten and had it at the lake yesterday.  Even my cat-hater husband thought this little kitty was precious!


8. Can I just say that Kason is a total Mama's boy.  The following took place at our house last night - It was about 9:30, Kason was exhausted from being out in the sun all day.  I was feeling like death warmed over (see #3).  I get home from CVS and Kason is screaming like someone is hurting him.  I stumble (literally) in the door, take Kason from Duane and hold him in the position I nurse him in.  He opened his eyes long enough to see it was me, and was sound asleep in literally 30 seconds.  I will cherish these times because someday I'll be that embarrassing mom! :)


9. Although Kason loves me, he loves his Daddy equally.  He loves to play with Duane and they are so cute together!  Since I have 2 sisters, this father-son bond is new to me and I absolutely LOVE it! :)


10. I love Instagram!  It's a photography app for iPhone and it has lots of filters that can add some cool effects to your iPhone pictures.  I love my SLR, but sometimes it's much easier to pull out my iPhone.  These filters make my iPhone pictures look way better!


I think that's all for now!  I can hear Kason starting to stir so that's my cue to end this post.  Happy Sunday! :)

The joys of breastfeeding

I went back and forth when deciding whether or not to blog about my breastfeeding experience.  It is something that I know I will want to remember years down the road, but it is also personal as I have gone through many challenges that have been hard.  I finally decided that I wanted to "put to paper" my breastfeeding experiences.  If you don't want to read, I don't blame you!  I'm doing this mostly for my memory but know that it might also help new moms that may be going through the same struggles.  I am not at all an expert, but I find it very encouraging when I hear that others are struggling with the same issues I am.

When I was pregnant I got asked multiple times if I would breastfeed.  I always said "yes", and never thought much about it.  As March got closer and closer I started to get more and more nervous about this foreign thing called breastfeeding.  I had no idea of the details involved.  I just thought, the milks there, I'll give it to the baby.  HA!  I was so naive!  

In February I dragged Duane to a breastfeeding class.  I remember the lactation consultant (a 60+ year old woman, weird) asking each of the women why they wanted to breastfeed.  I think I responded with the typical response, it's the healthiest thing for my baby and heck, it's free!  I also knew it would help me lose some of my baby weight which was a big plus.  I learned a lot in this class but nothing could really prepare me for what was to come.

I can't remember if I blogged about it in Kason's birth story, but I nursed Kason pretty much right after he exited the birth canal.  I had learned that this was the best thing to do.  I have to say it is amazing that this tiny person that I don't even know comes out of me and knows what he needs to do to get food.  SO crazy!  I was extremely nervous about this moment.  What if he didn't latch on?  What if my milk doesn't come in?  What if it hurts?  These were all questions that were flooding my mind.  Finally after all of those hours of pushing, it was time for that moment.  The moment I would place my sweet baby skin-to-skin (which by the way, I had no idea was so important until I had Kason) and attempt to feed him.

Kason had a lot of trouble latching on.  It was so frustrating because I wanted to desperately to provide food for my son, and I didn't feel like I was.  I think this is why so many people give up on breastfeeding.  The day after Kason was born I met with the lactation consultant (who was a-mazing!) and she patiently helped me.  I eventually have a use a shield so that Kason could latch on.  The LC said that way fine, as long as I weened him from it in a few weeks...ha!  Little did she know Kason would be 2.5 months before I got brave enough the ween him from the glorious shield.  Breastfeeding went pretty smoothly for a few weeks thanks to the shield, and much support from my sister and husband.  Don't get me worng, it was so difficult and demanding to be the only one that could feed Kason every 1.5 to 2 hours, but he was eating just fine.

Fast forward about 3 weeks.  This is when the crying started.  And by crying I mean screaming.  Every time Kason nursed, he would pull away screaming.  Every. Time.  I was so confused as to what had happened.  He was a different baby.  A much more irritable, fussy baby.  He would cry because he was hungry but would start eating and end up crying harder.  I was so discouraged and nearly gave up on breastfeeding all together.  Finally, after 2 weeks of lots of crying (from Kason and myself), I called the doctor.  The sweet nurse asked me to bring him in to see if it was a reflux issue.  We went to the doctor and Kason was diagnosed with a bad case acid reflux.  I love our pediatrician because he always makes me laugh.  He told me that it was acid reflux, which a lot of babies get, so I didn't need to worry.  I think his exact words were, "it's harmless but it will be pretty damn inconvenient for 6-9 months."  Fabulous I thought.  However, Kason was okay, and I could rest easy knowing that there wasn't anything seriously wrong.  He prescribed some Zantac which he assured me was not a cure, just helped with the symptoms associated with reflux.  Throughout this saga I also realized that cheese really upset Kason's belly.  Lovely!

After a couple of long, exhausting weeks the medicine finally started to help.  Gradually Kason stopped crying through feedings and I thought it was smooth sailing from here.  Wrong again!  About the time the crying stopped I got mastitis.  That's right, a breast infection that causes you to feel like you've been hit by a bus.  The LC warned me of this in the breastfeeding class I took and this really helped me know to go to the doctor right away.  I went to the doctor, got an antibiotic and was feeling much better within a week.  Around the time I got rid of the infection I decided to wean Kason from the shield.

Believe it or not, weening him from the shield was fairly easy.  It hurt REALLY bad because it was like starting all over, but it only took a few days.  This was a relief because it cut feeding times in half.  Kason was taking 30-40 minutes to eat with the shield.  Without it, 15-20 minutes.  This was a welcomed change for a mama that was feeling like a cow!  Ha!  

After 3.5 months,  I can finally say that breastfeeding is going well, which is great, except for the fact that the start of school is getting closer and closer.  Although I plan on pumping and continuing to only feed Kason breast milk (with the occasional formula as needed),  I obviously cannot continue exclusively breastfeeding.  This sweet baby has to take a bottle.  I have been pumping and attempting to give Kason a bottle, but have been failing miserably.  He does not want anything to do with the bottle.  Sigh.  I guess this boy just loves his mama (or boobs..ha!).  I am going to keep trying (with the help of many others) and eventually I know Kason will take the bottle.  After all, he doesn't really have a choice, right?!  My husband so kindly reminded me last night that I've overcome about every breastfeeding obstical that's been thrown my way, I will overcome this one as well.  I sure hope he is right! :)

So there it is.  The ups and downs of breastfeeding.  Looking back on it all I am so glad I stuck with it.  There are so many times I wanted to give up.  I was exhausted and frustrated but for some reason I kept with it.  I am glad I have been able to spend that intimate time with Kason.  It is something that has bonded us together and I will always cherish those quiet times.  I have spent those long hours staring at my sweet baby boy and praying for his life. Although it has been one of the hardest things I've done, I'm so glad I chose to do it.  I plan on doing it with my next baby as well, I just hope things go much more smoothly!

Whew, that was long!  Thanks for reading if you made it to the bottom!

**I think I should end this post by saying that I have nothing against formula feeding.  I was formula fed for most of my first year, and I think I turned out ok (others might disagree)!  Breastfeeding is a decision I made because I wanted to.  I know it is not for everyone.  The most important thing is feeding your baby, whether it be breast milk or formula. :)**